Welkom in Holland: Home of Crop Circles, Creator of Lara 2, and the Man with
the Golden Penis.
- The "All Night Horror Show" travels on. Although the rare and weird
series of screenings known as "Mundo Bizarro" came to an end last June, there
still remains one series of cult films presently available for viewing in the
Lowlands (including such freaky favorites as "The Incredibly Strange
Creatures Who Stopped Living and Became Mixed-Up Zombies" and "Sexy Nights of
the Living Dead") See July's TGH Buzz and check out
- Dutch director Jan de Bont's next film will be "Tomb Raider 2: Lara Croft
And The Cradle Of Life" (starring, of course, the inevitable Angelina Jolie
as LC with Chris Barrie and Noah Taylor at her titillating side). Shooting
starts shortly in England, Africa, Greece, and China. This time around our
new age heroine goes searching for Pandora's box under water. Once a Chinese
gang grasps the box from her, Lara naturally has to travel in search of it
along the Great Wall. De Bont's work is always visually stunning, so we can
expect a super-duper time undisturbed by any extensive story line which might
not fit the image.
- Meanwhile, it remains to be seen how the Lowlands react to the portrait
given of "Goldmember" as a glowing-penised, excema-eating, evil Dutchman. We
think it's hysterical! But don't tell your "fa-wah".
- The annual Amsterdam "Uitmarkt" will take place this year between the
23rd and 25th of august on the Museumplein. This square itself has been
troubled by its new grass lawn ever since the field was renovated. It seems
that the grass here suffers as much as the grass in the new ArenA and costs
millions to replace each time it's used. (What happened to the good,
old-fashioned kind of grass? Seems like you just can't find it in Amsterdam
anymore.) This edition of the Artistic Market ("Uitmarkt") will mark the
last time this particular square will be used without the exploiter being
charged for the laying of a new grass field when extensively damaged. The
times, they certainly are a-changin'! Anyhow, back to the "Uitmarkt": One
of the many performances on show this year will be: "Puppetry of the Penis:
the ancient art of genital oragami" from Australia.
- Somewhere in the flatlands between Stadskanaal and Onstwedde in Holland,
crop circles have recently been discovered for the third year in a row.
According to the DCCA (Dutch Crop Circle Archive), these cannot possibly be
the work of man. Nevertheless, the Dutch distribution division of Buena
Vista denies that there is any connection between these events and the
upcoming film "Signs", due to be released in Holland next month. (And let's
be honest, how could there be, unless they have aliens working inside their
PR department?) You're probably wiser staying out of the fields this month.
I don't know about you folks, but I prefer to go into the cinema to blow my
- Remember the teaming of Irish actor Liam Neeson with his wife, English
actress Natasha Richardson, in the Jody Foster film "Nell"? No? Well, the
couple has been searching for another viable vehicle to work on together and
have finally come up with the gothic thriller "Asylum", based on a novel of
the same name by Patrick McGrath. Focusing on a taboo love affair that
develops in a mental asylum in 1950s England, Richardson will play the wife
of a superintendent at a mental hospital whose loneliness drives her to
develop a relationship with an artist who killed his wife and was declared
insane. An intense, character driven piece, the film, to be directed by
David Mackenzie, is scheduled to begin shooting next spring.
- 911 will live in everyone's minds for a long time to come. The six
designs handed in by architects for a memorial have met with disapproval
from a specific segment of the public (who allegedly would rather see space
utilized for housing and real estate). Could these people be real estate
developers? We must await future reports on this. Another memorial,
however, and this one to the victims of the Great Famine in Ireland has been
formally opened in New York's Battery Park recently. President Mary
McAleese was guest of honor at the ceremony for the unveiling of the
creation by American artist Brian Tolle who has used the quarter acre
available to him to recreate a corner of rural Co. Mayo, complete with the
reconstructed remains of a cottage from Attymass. A little part of Ireland
in NY: turn west by Battery Park, Lower Manhattan and you will be transported
into a small, rocky green field with rushes, stone walls and a ruined
cottage. Almost a million Irish people immigrated to New York in the years
around the Famine and many of their descendants were in attendance at the
recent opening ceremony. A gift from the Irish people (or more specifically
the Slack family in Co. Mayo on whose land the cottage originally stood)
Tolle oversaw the dismantling, shipment and reconstruction of the stone
cottage which now stands, as he described it, as a "living memory" to the
emigrants of Ireland.
- Ireland is tied to America and America is tied to Ireland. John Mahoney,
best known as Martin Crane in the TV sitcom "Frasier", formally opened the
Galway Arts Festival (which he referred to as "the best arts festival in the
world") last month where he also appeared in the stage play "The Drawer Boy."
The play has since transferred to the Peacock Theatre in Dublin and will run
till August 10th.
- One last sad note. With the closure in New York of Forty Second Street's
"Peeporama" on July 31st, an era has come to an end. Long lost forever are
the late night cinemas where one could enjoy cheap movies and cheap thrills
at the same time.
© 1994-2006 The Green Hartnett